St. Vincent’s College
May 18, 2007
Jonathan M. Daube
President
Manchester Community College

President Fisher, trustees, faculty, graduates, family and friends:

The sole purpose of a commencement speaker is to provide that last opportunity for students to take a short nap before going out and facing the world.  If you haven’t yet learned to sleep with your eyes open, here’s your last chance.  Faculty, administrators and trustees too.  Admit it: a mid-morning nap can be good for your mental and physical health.  Besides, no one will test you, no one will care whether you remember what I said or not.  So relax, but please no snoring: that would be rude, and St. Vincent’s College students are known for their good manners when people in funny clothes come to visit.

Today marks your commencement rather than your graduation.  The word “graduation” suggests looking back, and there’s nothing wrong with that.  But the word “commencement”, as President Fisher suggested, implies looking forward, and that can be exciting.  You’ve all heard the saying from the late sixties, “Today is the first day of the rest of your life.”  Trite, but true.  You are trained to help people, you are trained to make a difference, you will occasionally save a life.  That’s awesome.  You may not become a millionaire, but you will save a life.  Wow.  I can’t say that President Fisher or I have ever saved a life ? maybe he has ? but you assuredly will.  You are entering a noble profession.  Whether you work in a birthing facility or a hospice, you are in the business of celebrating life.  And I honor you for that.

I respect anyone who chooses the nursing profession.  I applaud you for the sheer amount of work you have done to get to this point.  Your teachers have told me that you are very focused: that means that you are true professionals.  I hope your families and friends fully understand that nursing and all the allied health careers are callings, not just jobs.  They should be very, very proud of you.  And I make the assumption that all nurses are going to help me: as I grow older, that becomes an ever greater comfort to me.  When my final days come, I hope a graduate of St. Vincent’s College or Manchester Community College is monitoring me and holding my hand and talking to me.  What makes this college special is your philosophy of community service and caring. 

I sense something spiritual in what I have learned about your colIege: and what is beautiful about it is that you are respectful of all religions and of people who have none; you respect all of us; you leave no one out. 

You should know that I visited the College in March and talked with Sim-Man: he told me everything I need to know!

He told me that he recently read in the Hartford Courant that a man rushed into St. Vincent’s Hospital and said to the nurse on duty, “I’m shrinking, I’m shrinking.  I’ve got to see a doctor.”  The nurse calmly responded, “You’ve got to be a little patient.”  Groan.  And be prepared for anything.

Shortly after President Fisher asked me to come and speak with you today, I tried to learn something about Saint Vincent de Paul.  He was a Frenchman who lived from 1580 to 1660.  So he was eighty when he died.  What struck me, in addition to the great things he accomplished ? and they were great things; helping the poor and creating what we would call hospices ? what struck me was how old he became!  That may surprise you.  Life expectancy in rural France four hundred years ago was in the mid-twenties!  Today it’s in the mid seventies for men and the low eighties for women.  So I find myself thinking: how did St. Vincent feel in the last ten years or so of his life, when most of his friends were long gone?  Was he a healthy seventy-year-old?  What was life like when you were lucky to live into your thirties or forties?  And this whole business of living longer is due to nurses and doctors and researchers and dietitians ? I had to say that, because my wife is a gerontological dietitian ? people in your business.  I thank you.  We all do.

I admire how people in your profession stay current.  The world of health care changes so fast, it’s hard to stay up-to-date.  New drugs come onto the marketplace every single day, and all of them carry some risk, however small.  How do you stay current?  I assume you get in  the habit of reading certain journals on a regular basis.  Perhaps you’ll come back to St. Vincent’s for updates.  In many ways, your education didn’t end yesterday; it begins today.  Commencement, not graduation.  And as part of your commencement, your beginning the next stage of the adventure we call life, some homework.  (College presidents love to give homework.)  Write a letter to someone who has made a real difference in your life.  It could be a faculty member at St. Vincent’s College, it could be a grade school teacher, it could be anyone who has touched you over the years and whose efforts you remember with gratitude.  Just imagine the joy you will bring to this person.  Do it.  And do it soon.

I used to be an English teacher, so I hope you are all in the habit of reading.  Almost anything.  The daily paper, for sure ? on-line or however you choose to read it.  A couple of professional journals.  You are a professional now, no longer just a student.  And that means that you have to take charge of your continuing education.  Beginning right now.  Today really is the first day of the rest of your life.  Some of you will go on to bachelor’s and master’s degrees, and that’s a wonderful thought ? even if it’s not in your plans right now.

And you should have a point of view on some of the major issues of the day.  If you have an informed point of view, then you have room in your heart and mind to respect people who think differently from you.  That’s how we humans seek for the truth: we read, we argue, we read some more, we discuss some more ? that’s how we learn.  Some truths remain the same, of course, while others can shift.  People used to believe that the earth is flat; people used to believe that slavery is OK.  I hope that this college has helped you towards the wisdom you will need to sort out one kind of truth from another.

As professionals ? and you’re all professionals now ? we all need to work with people with whom we disagree.  You have, I hope, been trained to be inclusive.  When you help people, it doesn’t matter if they are Black or white, communicants or not, sinners or saints; they are human, and you have been trained to help them, not judge them.  A second piece of homework: within the next couple of weeks, have a meaningful conversation with someone you disagree with profoundly, maybe someone you wouldn’t normally choose to talk with.  In speech and debate classes, they often tell you to take the opposing point of view from the one you truly hold: the theory is that you understand a belief better if you can argue for the opposition.  The first piece of homework, remember, was to write to someone who has made a profound difference in your life.

Now that you are becoming graduates of this College, people will be looking to you for answers.  That can be a heady experience.  You are the experts now.  You are it.  There’s a wonderful story about John XXIII, who was Pope from 1958 to 1963.  He once said, “It often happens that I wake at night and begin to think about a serious problem and decide I must tell the Pope about it.  Then I wake up completely and remember that I am the Pope.”  Similarly, you are the experts now; you are it.

A piece of advice, probably unnecessary: if you don’t know the answer to a question or are unsure, there is nothing wrong with saying, “I don’t know.”  No one should get angry with you for that.  I love it when people say, “I’ll ask around,” or “I’ll look it up and get back to you.”  I love it even more when they say, “I’ll get back to you within 24 hours.”  Or 48.  And when they take a note of my phone number or e-mail address, then I know they’re serious.  Remember: most people you deal with professionally are anxious, even if they swear to you that they are not.  Just assume that anyone who needs your services is anxious.  So be nice to them.  Always.  Even if they’re a pain.  You can still be firm if you have to; but be nice.  I’ll never forget the nurse who got me up after a minor operation almost forty years ago.  She was very nice, but she was also very very firm.  You see: I didn’t want to get up, but I had no choice.  I don’t even remember if I was mad at her at the time.

Forgive me if you have already heard this one.  A graduate of St. Vincent’s College died and arrived before St. Peter, who explained, “We have this policy of allowing you to choose whether you want to spend eternity in heaven or in hell.”  “How do I know which to choose?” she asked.  “That’s easy,” said St. Peter, “You can spend a day in each place before making a decision.”  So he put her on an elevator and sent her to hell.  The elevator doors opened and the St. Vincent’s grad. found herself in a sunny garden, where she was greeted by former colleagues and friends.  They had a great time, ending with dinner, paid for by Dr. Fisher, in a fancy restaurant.  She even met the devil, who seemed a jolly fellow.  Soon her day was over, and she took the elevator to heaven.  That second day in heaven was OK.  She lounged around on clouds, sang songs, and played the harp.  Towards the end of the day, St. Peter asked for her decision.  “Well,” she said, “I know it may seem strange, but I had a better time in hell, so that’s what I’ll choose.”  She got in the elevator, and went back down.  When the doors opened, she saw a desolate wasteland with garbage and filth.  Her friends were dressed in rags and looked miserable.  She spoke to the devil.  “I don’t understand.  Yesterday this place was beautiful, with laughter and a delicious meal.”  The devil responded: “Yesterday we were recruiting you.  Today you’re staff.”

I do want to say something to the family members and friends out there.  You really should be proud, as I’ve said already.  Can you think of anything better than being a nurse?  And I have homework for you too!  Take your loved one aside and tell them ? one more time ? that you love them and that you will always be there for them.  Because nursing is hard work, challenging work.  So tell them maybe in a new way how much they mean to you.  And not just because I asked you to, but because you really want to and this is a good time to do it.  

In April, 2005, Dr. Fisher invited me to speak at his inauguration as President of this College.  Since the primary mission of your college is in the fields of nursing and allied health, I consulted a medical dictionary and shared ten of the definitions that I found and which I propose to repeat today.  Those of you who were at the 2005 event may continue with your gentle slumbers but ? remember ? no snoring.  The ten definitions, then:

BACTERIA.   The back door of the cafeteria.

CAT SCAN.   Searching for a kitty.

DILATE.  To live long.

ENEMA.  Not a friend.

NITRATES.  Cheaper than day rates.

RECTUM.  Almost killed ‘em.

SEIZURE.  A Roman emperor.

TERMINAL ILLNESS.  Getting sick at the airport.

URINE.  Opposite of “you’re out.”

VARICOSE.  Nearby.

About twenty-four centuries ago, there lived a physician named Hippocrates, who is commonly regarded as the father of modern medicine.  He swore an oath, an oath that is still very well known, and among other things he said, “I will prescribe regimens for the good of my patients according to my ability and my judgment and never do harm to anyone.”  People sometimes change this around a little bit to read, “? to help, or at least to do no harm.”  When you think about it, if you do no harm from this moment forward ? or, at least, no intentional harm ? you’re already ahead of the game.  The Hippocratic oath is similar to the pledge of fidelity that you promised at your pinning ceremony a few days ago.  And I note that you solemnly pledged “to serve all those entrusted to my care as persons of worth and dignity.”   That means all persons, and it’s totally irrelevant whether you like them or not or agree with them or not.

Hippocrates also said, “All that may come to my knowledge in the exercise of my profession ? which ought not to be spread abroad, I will keep secret and will never reveal.”  In other words, he knew when to stop talking.

So in the spirit of Hippocrates, I will try to do no further harm today.  And to the relief of your President, I do plan to stop talking.

I wish you and your families and your friends light and joy and satisfaction.  Don’t ever try to be perfect; always try to do your best. 

Thank you for your kind attention.